“How can we raise our children better?” is a question that occupies the minds of all parents and whose answer is sought. Child rearing is a dynamic process without a magic wand.
We may expect pills, magic wands, and miracle changes in raising children, but it should not be forgotten that investing in a child is a long process and requires patience and effort.
Erik Homburger Erikson (born Erik Salomonsen; 15 June 1902 – 12 May 1994) was a German-American developmental psychologist and psychoanalyst known for his theory on psychological development of human beings. He coined the phrase identity crisis.
- He was born in 1902 in Germany.
- He based his education on Greek, Latin, Philosophy and Art at the American College.
- Instead of enrolling in a university because he was against the official education system, he traveled to Europe for a while and wrote about his experiences.
- He went to Vienna in 1927 and taught children, using the psychoanalytic approach in the education of children with a very radical attitude for that period.
- He immigrated to the United States in 1933 and started working at Harvard University as the country's first child psychoanalyst.
- He later held various positions at Yale, Berkeley, and the Menninger Foundation. He then returned to Harvard and continued to work at Harvard until his retirement in 1970.
Erik Homburger Erikson was born out of wedlock. He was raised as a Jew due to his mother's marriage to a Jewish businessman. His family hid this situation from him for a long time, and this event pushes him to think and research about his past. In Vienna, he met Sigmund Freud's daughter, Anna Freud, and had her undergo psychoanalysis.
Based on his experience, he decides to take psychoanalysis training. Anna Freud, who was also a primary school teacher, was working specifically on child psychiatry. Under the influence of Anna Freud, Erikson also turns his attention to child education. After the Nazis came to power, Erikson immigrated to the United States with his wife. He settled in Boston and took academic positions at many institutions, including Yale and Harvard universities.
According to Erikson, a person grows throughout life in interaction with the environment. The self acquires its strength gradually and throughout life. He is considered a pioneer of lifelong developmental psychology. Erikson suggests that this development occurs in eight stages. Each of these eight periods has its own unique requirements, tasks to be fulfilled, problems to be solved, and turning points.
Personality development occurs by meeting these needs, solving problems, and fulfilling tasks at the appropriate time. According to Erikson, 1-3 years of age is the period when the child tries to control his own muscular system. The two most important events of the period are toilet training and walking. Walking is the first movement to be independent of parents. The child walks to where he/she wants, not where his/her parents take him/her or goes away from where he/she does not want.
The child develops a sense of autonomy by thinking, “I am a separate entity from my parents”. The first reflection of this feeling is stubbornness. Doing the opposite of what is said means not accepting the parent's authority. The main factor in gaining a sense of autonomy is to make independent physical movements.
If parents allow the toddler to explore his environment, the child develops a sense of independence. Parents should not restrict physical movements as much as possible at this stage. Restrictive behaviors cause the child to be suspicious. The child doubts that he can act alone. When this situation is repeated many times, the child turns into someone who cannot make independent decisions and avoids responsibility in the future. Then he becomes suspicious of the people around him.
While gaining the awareness of self-control, the protection of self-esteem should be ensured. In order to raise a self-reliant child in the future, the child must be allowed to truly stand on his own feet from the very first moment he starts walking.
According to Erikson, the individual evolves by solving problems in the developmental stage. According to Erikson, the eight stages of an individual's psychosocial development are:
- Basic trust versus distrust
- Suspicion and shame toward autonomy
- Assertiveness vs Guilt
- Industriousness versus inferiority
- Identity versus role confusion
- Intimacy versus loneliness
- Stagnation versus productivity
- Despair against self-integrity
Erikson travels to Berkeley in 1939, this time to study the Yurok Indians, a fishing tribe. He left Berkeley in 1950 and settled in Stockbridge, Massachusetts, to work with youth. In 1960, he was called a professor at Harvard. There he has the opportunity to explain his theory of the life process, especially his theory of "identity crisis". He started working as a psychiatry consultant at Mount Zion Hospital in San Francisco in 1972. In the following years, he continued his studies and writings, preserving his old interests.